There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize