Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I am available for nakedness
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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