69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
