mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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