Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize