Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
