guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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