the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
