Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize