Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize