By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
