How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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