He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize