Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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