I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
cat food counts as protein by the way
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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