he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I wish I only lived at night.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
