But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
