Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize