dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
not ubering you a puppy
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
