Whats the count minus fat chicks?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
