Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
