I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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