Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
