Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
