they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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