i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
