Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
