She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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