i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
