ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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