Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
