Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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