Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
