And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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