Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
