I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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