I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
