Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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