I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
