I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
im having a threesome with these popsicles
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
