hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Randomize
