Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
