i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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