I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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