New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
