We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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