It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
