We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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