just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize