Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
