i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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