i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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